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I left the woods for as good a reason as I went there.  Perhaps it seemed to me that I had several more lives to live, and could not spare more time for that one.  It is remarkable how easily and insensibly we fall into a particular route, and make a beaten track for ourselves.”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden

Reading Walden

Title page of one edition of Walden with Thoreau's portrait

After more than two years at Walden’s Pond, Henry David Thoreau left his little cabin in the woods.  His experiences there are a reminder to me to follow my dreams and the urgings of my heart.

“I learned this, at least, by my experiment:  that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success unexpected in common hours.”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden

Writing these weekly Thoreau posts has become something of a habit.  And as Thoreau observes in this week’s quote, we are creatures of habit and find comfort in them.  Habits do bring a reassuring structure to one’s days.

But this post concludes my year of reading Walden.  I think I will be at a bit of a loss for a while as I move away from Thoreau Thursdays to new projects.  But I, too, have several more lives to live, and it’s time to move on.

My life feels quite satisfying when I structure it as a series of personal projects, and part of the fun is finding something I can be passionate about and devote my energies to during the finite time I have left in this world.  I want to continue to challenge myself to not just repeat past successes, but to step into the uncertainties beyond, to push my boundaries, and to explore the unfamiliar.  I will move forward bolstered by the gifts I’ve received from reading Thoreau this past year.

Thanks for coming along for the ride.

The Layers
by Stanley Kunitz

I have walked through many lives,
some of them my own,
and I am not who I was,
though some principles of being
abides, from which I struggle
not to stray.
When I look behind,
as I am compelled to look
before I can gather strength
to proceed on my journey,
I see the milestones dwindling
toward the horizon
and the slow fires trailing
from the abandoned camp-sites,
over which scavenger angles
wheel on heavy wings.
Oh, I have made myself a tribe
out of my true affections,
and my tribe is scattered!
How shall the heart be reconciled
to its feast of losses?
In a rising wind
the manic dust of my friends,
those who fell along the way,
bitterly stings my face.
Yet I turn, I turn,
exulting somewhat,
with my will intact to go
wherever I need to go,
and every stone on the road
precious to me.
In my darkest night,
when the moon was covered
and I roamed through wreckage,
a nimbus-clouded voice
directed me:
“Live in the layers,
not on the litter.”
Though I lack the art
to decipher it,
no doubt the next chapter
in my book of transformations
is already written.
I am not done with my changes.

The end of the road for Thoreau Thursdays

“If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be.  Now put the foundations under them.”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden

The closest photo I've got of a castle in the air -- Mont St. Michel, 2002

Mont St. Michel, 2002

“Humanity does not require inspiration, the companion not just of poets and novelists but also of musicians, painters, not to mention some scholars and clergymen and even those who write (wrote) wonderful long letters, because it’s accompanied by euphoria, bliss (although it is).  We need it above all because it raises us above the petty network of empirical circumstances that make up our everyday lot and confinement.  It lifts us above the quotidian so that we can scrutinize the world attentively and ardently.”
— from A Defense of Ardor: Adam Zagajewski Essays, translated by Clare Cavanagh

“We spent our lives making livings.”
— Jonathan Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

Perhaps one of my biggest failings is not having big enough dreams.  I was never encouraged as a child to think big, in fact, “You think you are so big” was a common criticism you wanted to avoid being aimed at you.  Now that I am older, I think about lost potential and buried talents.  And it grieves me to think I may have squandered my gifts on making a living.

Of course, it is not too late to plant a castle in the air, to dream big.  And then to build the necessary foundations, stone by stone.  And at my age, I’ve learned a few lessons about how to go about this:

  •  It takes dedication and hard work.  Malcolm Gladwell’s book, Outliers, says that it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert at anything.  Or, as Henri Cartier-Bresson said, “Your first 10,000 photographs are your worst.”
  • Falling short is normal.
  • Success come to those who don’t quit.  Rewards come to those who persist and persevere.
  • Don’t wait for inspiration.  Results will come out of the process of work, work, and more work.
  • Don’t spread yourself too thin.  Make your foundation-building work the top item on your daily To-Do lists.
  • The journey is the destination.

I like the dual message of Thoreau’s quote this week — have big dreams and castles in the sky but not without building strong foundations to support them.

P. S. One of the bloggers I follow, Adrienne at the Whiteley Creek Bed & Breakfast in Minnesota, recently recounted how Thoreau’s quote about castles in the air applies to her life.  You can read her post here.

“If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer.  Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden

Drummers, Shadle Park H. S. Pipeband, Tieton Highland Days Parade

This week Thoreau’s quote again celebrates individuality, but it is also a call for tolerance.  I think I am a fairly tolerant person, but the bigger challenge for me is to embrace differences.  Surely enjoying the company of people who are different from me will enrich my life in ways I cannot predict.

If I want to continue growing as a person, I must stretch myself — find the opportunities and lessons in the hardships that come my way, invite conversations with people who are not like me, travel to places outside my comfort zone, and use  my imagination to bring me closer to understanding and acceptance of the world I live in.

At the same time, I must find the beat of my own drum, even if it takes me out of step with the conventions of the day.  This is a lot to reflect on!

 

“Money is not required to buy one necessary of the soul.”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden

Wrapped pennies

“However mean your life is, meet it and live it; do not shun it and call it hard names.  It is not so bad as you are.  It looks poorest when you are richest.”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden

“For I don’t care too much for money
Cause money can’t buy me love.”
— John Lennon and Paul McCartney, “Can’t Buy Me Love”

When you are struggling with paying yet another bill and trying to save for your next car or retirement, it is easy to forget that money does not buy happiness.  When you do stop to think about what is important in life, it’s the intangibles like love, satisfying work, or communication that most improve the quality of your life.  And these “necessaries of the soul”  can accrue to even the poorer among us.

Here are a few of my favorite things that can be had for no money.  What would be on your list?

  • walking barefoot on a sandy beach where the waves lap the shore
  • a hot shower
  • listening to the gleeful giggles of children
  • getting lost in a good library book
  • finding a hand-written letter in the mailbox
  • spooning in bed
  • the smell of freshly baked bread
  • an unexpected snow day
  • a comfortable rocking chair
  • cradling a baby in your lap
  • beach combing for pretty shells
  • the scent of lilacs
  • birdwatching
  • tree watching
  • cloud watching
  • loving and supporting my family

 

 

 

“One attraction in coming to the woods to live was that I should have leisure and opportunity to see the Spring come in.”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden

Watercolor sketch of spring crocuses

“Walden is melting apace.”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden

“They were pleasant spring days, in which the winter of man’s discontent was thawing as well as the earth, and the life that had lain torpid began to stretch itself.”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden

The spring equinox arrives this year in Seattle on March 19th at 10:14 p.m. Pacific Standard Time.  Like Thoreau, I especially enjoy welcoming this new season and watch with interest the changes that mark the transition from our cold winters.

Seattle springs are long, drawn-out affairs.  The changeover from winter is very gradual and the blooming and blossoming moves forward in progression over many days and months.  We do not have the extremes of weather like the Midwest and our four seasons are not so pronounced:

“Seattle spring was a delicate flowering of the pale gray winter — a pastel prelude to the pale yellow summer which flowed gently into the lavender autumn and on into the pale gray winter.  It was all very subtle and, as we wore the same clothes the year around . . . we were never season conscious.”
— Betty MacDonald, The Egg and I

I will try to stay attentive to these subtle seasonal changes and celebrate each new arrival —  crocuses, daffodils, longer days, rhubarb, asparagus . . .  Welcome Spring!

 

“At the same time that we are earnest to explore and learn all things, we require that all things be mysterious and unexplorable, that land and sea be infinitely wild, unsurveyed and unfathomed by us because unfathomable.  We can never have enough of nature.”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden

Feeling the awesome grandeur of the wilderness along the old Alaska Highway

Contemplating the mystery of Exit Glacier, Alaska

Glacier Bay National Park

What is wilderness but untamed nature.  Living in the city, I get my contact with nature in small, mostly tamed doses.  This is good therapy.  But touching the untamed wilderness brings a heightened sense of the mystery and hugeness of the universe, a sense of awe tinged with fear.

I’ve traveled to several of the country’s national parks, but none evoked this sense of grandeur quite like my trips to Alaska.  So much of that vast land is still wild and inaccessible.  I felt fortunate that there were a few roads and cruise ships that could take me to the edges of that unexplored wilderness so that I could stand humbled by the spirit of that wildness.

How lucky we are that there are still wild places to stir our hearts and souls.